tintila: (Default)
Mithiel ([personal profile] tintila) wrote2022-10-06 09:52 pm
Entry tags:

sexuality


Relationships & Sexuality

So, it may be a little extra to make a whole post about this but it was crowding up the permissions post and it is genuinely a little complicated, so here we are.

I play Mithiel as a bisexual woman, she is single unless she is in a PSL where she is not and is often fairly sure a wedding isn't in her cards. Not for lack of want of it so much as before Beleriand sinks she never felt she had any prospects and afterwards she wasn't that interested.

She is romantic and friendly and may know a few too many raunchy poems and songs but usually has never acted on the knowledge except maybe as a solo endeavour.

Simple enough, yeah?


And then there was canon

I love the man, but Tolkien was both romantic and very Catholic, and so his favourite children are kind of that way too when in proper canon mode.

I'm not going to try to explain it all here and expect people to read it, but if you want a fuller view of what this means click here to see Tolkien Gateway's pretty extensive section on the topic.

The tl;dr version is basically that elves marry for love, and that marriage is ultimately as little as the union of bodies – just once – and that binds their souls together. They also have to actively choose to get pregnant, which is a part I actually like. Save for one exception they never remarry, they also don't have affairs, they don't have youthful flings that go anywhere physical. They don't even stay sexually interested in their partners after they've had enough children.

While I do actually play this as Mithiel's default state (esp for gen memes), lest I stray too far from (the word of) God, I understand it is problematic for casual rp. And to be frank it's problematic for any rp that's not with a Tolkien character that turns at all romantic and I like to entertain a romance or fling when people are interested.



Ergo...

My solution is to put her somewhere in the middle for the average thread that turns romantic or hot and heavy.

That is to say that unless you express interest in the "we banged, now we're wedded" side of things I am going to go ahead and assume that you have picked this option and they are not on an instant honeymoon.

This option is for a Mithiel who is romantic and not sworn to the very first person she makes love to. Though she would still pick partners sparingly because heartache when you could live until the world ends is a bit rough. In this situation there is no Valar or Ilúvatar given mandate demanding such a chaste and limited sexuality for the elves, only their own caution holding them back.

This is her default on any romantic or horny memes especially. It is a lot, otherwise.

If you do happen to want to marry her but we started with this in-between solution then I would say that marriage works much the same way as pregnancy does for elves – through an active and mutual choice for it to become reality.

If you have questions or concerns please feel free to comment.


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